I live and teach in what I describe as the Marvelous Messy Middle– it’s where I welcome ALL the feelings in my emotional family, appreciate all the marvelous, hang out pretty happily in the middle, and allow and accept the messy- sometimes very messy.
David & I just returned from a week in Mendocino on a private creative visioning retreat.
Being there is like living inside of a painting, and sets the stage for all sorts of creative outbursts and inflows.
In the middle of our week, seemingly out of nowhere, I began experiencing significant pain in one of my teeth.
This did not feel at all welcome- especially in the middle of our glorious time. Very messy indeed.
Yet here was my darling tooth, calling out for help. Pain is a great motivator, and love is an even better one.
I found a loving oral surgeon, and with the help of some medication and homeopathics, was able to delay having a necessary procedure until our return home several days later. I felt so relieved and gratefull that we could stay to complete our visioning time.
Do you relate to what I describe as the Marvelous Messy Middle? And what’s your version?
We returned home and I was scheduled to have dental surgery the next day.
All my different feelings then showed up- fear, dread, despair, rage, resistance and just general upset.
I finally realized that my inner children all wanted to express their feelings, so I encouraged them to stomp around the house shouting things like, “It’s not fair!” “I’m not going and you can’t make me!”
Thankfully I know how to welcome and love these aspects of myself, as well as others, and know that their expression makes way for me to be able to bring my marvelous messy middle adult self more whole heartedly to experiences like dental surgery, IRS audits, DMV’s, and all the other life stuff that is not characteristically thought of as marvelous.
I appreciate being able to blend and alchemize the terrible and wonderfull things into a brand new healing mixture.
And I’m so glad to be able to teach and share what I know about living and playing in these ways.
And the surgery? In addition to his doing an excellent job, I was laughing during it, as was he, because the Pandora station I chose was playing 70’s music that correlated perfectly to what was happening- like “Dust in the Wind- all we are is dust in the wind…..”
I’m gratefull to be pain free and experiencing better dental health than I was before- and there is always more to learn!
Let me know how you’re living and playing, I’ll love to hear.
Love,
SARK
P.S. My Succulent Wild World membership and program is reopening in October and you’re invited! Go here to be on my priority list and receive more information~
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Hi! I appreciate your story and your letting your emotions out when you returned to have the surgery. I have been staying with friends all summer after needing to sell my house and was feeling desperate about finding a place to rent while I get some clarity. I moved into a place out of a not-centered place that I had to leave almost immediately because of mold. Losing money in the deal.
One day I forced myself to stay home and let myself have a little temper tantrum and told Spirit “I need a place to live RIGHT NOW!” and then let myself do mindless activities all day and keep my vibe up. At 3:00 in the afternoon I received a text from an acquaintance asking if I still needed a place to live? I am so happy to report I will be moving into a gorgeous house next week for 6 months- just perfect!
Preparing to be fired from a terrible toxic job that just isn’t working. I’m so disappointed in the loss and what the future holds for me. Scared!!! If I can go play like a kid one day a week it helps! I’m taking bubblebaths, hiking in nature during our beautiful foliage season and adding plenty of rest is what I incorporate during my messy middle. I’m trying really hard to stay calm and not feel the overwhelming trembling I feel inside. I’m trying to remember this is hard to do and to be gentle with myself. I’m also trying to remember I’m not alone on this journey as an adult.
Thank you SARK for the lovely reminders on the many tools we can apply to help ourselves through it all. PS: Hope the toothfairy came to visit 🙂
I always enjoy your letters and have been following your marvelous messy life for ages (decades).
I’m struggling lately after the recent passing of my younger brother. I’m 63 and he was only 58. This comes 8 years after losing another younger brother who was 48. I was the family rescuer, fixer. So losing them was horrible because there wasn’t anything I could do to save them. It’s hard to accept and understand. Thanks for listening. Sending you lots of appreciation for your years of joy!
Thank you, Sark, for your wise and wonderful wisdom. Yes, sometimes, life happens and we are caught in the “messy middle”. We can caught up in it, rant and rave, but I truly appreciate your take on this. Right now I am caught in this messy area and need to remind myself that it will pass but I need to remember to have the perspective of “creating something new” . I like this much better. So, as the ministry position is not clear– I can see ways I can participate that will help rather than hinder what is happening…( fallow ground). I can only say; thank you for helping me to embrace the creative me!
Laura