Happy Furthers Day

I’ve created a new Father’s Day option and I’m calling it Furthers Day. It’s all about how many fathers further great things, and how you can carry that furthering further by sharing more love.

For all the wonderfull fathers who are furthering someone or something, THANK you. Here’s to all the love that goes further because of all the loving fathers.

My husband David is this kind of father to his two grown children, and I’m lucky and honored to witness and participate in their love and their furthering.

I’m also blessed to have a loving father-in-law, also known as my “father in love.” Thank you to Barry.

I want to honor all the loving fathers in the afterlife- their spirits surround us. All the love in the world to everyone grieving the physical or emotional loss of a father or father figure.

Thank you to all the fabulous father figures, uncles, grandfathers and great-grandfathers.

And, Father’s Day isn’t an easy celebration for everyone.

It can be challenging to either join in or ignore the holiday called Father’s Day if you experienced, or are experiencing any of the following with a father or father figure: difficult, distant, absent or challenging fathers, or abusive, lost, mentally disordered, unloving or ragefull fathers.

The imprint of challenging fathers calls for a lifetime of integration.

My dad did a lot of fabulous furthering, and we were also challenged by the difficulties of relating to, and loving each other.

I went further because of the challenges of our relationship. When I told him I was going to be an author and write books for the world, he sarcastically said, “Dream on, kid!”

And so I did.

I also learned later that he was scared for me, and didn’t know how to express that, except through sarcasm.

When he was absent for so much of my childhood, I learned better how to love myself.

I also learned later that his necessary absences as a traveling salesman was what financially supported our family.

When he couldn’t express or share his feelings, I created innovative ways to feel and express mine and now I help others to do that too.

I want to add that it doesn’t always work out like these examples, and there is sometimes too much trauma to repair. Healing happens in spirals and layers, and sometimes needs to move through generations before changes might be seen-or not. We go further with love to see what might be able to heal.

My dad helped me to further so many good things in my life. From him helping me to ride my first bike, to later in my life supporting my big ideas and wild dreams, I almost always felt his love.

I went further because of that love, and I believe that he did too.

Did you have a father or father figure who helped, or helps you to go further? I’ll love to know.

Here’s to us all going further with all the love- so much love.

Love, SARK