Stop

I think it's time to stop naming hurricanes after people!

I have always wondered why we name hurricanes after people, and particularly noticed it after hurricane Katrina, when I thought how difficult it must have been to have the name Katrina after the destruction that occurred.

Then I wondered again how anyone named Irene felt as that hurricane was being written about literally everywhere, and spoken about as "colossally destructive" and "devastating."

I've researched the reasons for the naming of hurricanes, and have read the most nonsensical, illogical "reasons," including that no one could remember any other naming methods. Have they really tried?

My sister-in-law Jennifer and I have come up with a brilliant new plan.

How about naming them after fish? Doesn't hurricane Lemon Shark have a good ring to it? Or hurricane Pufferfish?

This has the dual purpose of building awareness for the species of fish that's named, and the fish aren't bothered by reading about the mass destruction that their name is associated with. And we can be educated about all sorts of fish types.

If we need more names, how about food? Hurricane licorice whip sounds good. Or hurricane donut? That would perhaps reduce the obesity rate as people could associate unhealthy food with natural disasters.

My friend Valerie wasn't too concerned about all of this until I pointed out that her name is on the 2012 hurricane list- along with:

Alberto
Beryl
Chris
Debby
Ernesto
Florence
Gordon
Helene
Isaac
Joyce
Kirk
Leslie
Michael
Nadine
Oscar
Patty
Rafael
Sandy
Tony
Valerie
William

And here are the proposed plans for hurricane names from 2013-2016:

2013
Andrea, Barry, Chantal, Dorian, Erin, Fernand, Gabrielle, Humberto, Ingrid, Jerry, Karen, Lorenzo, Melissa, Nestor, Olga, Pablo, Rebekah, Sebastien, Tanya, Van Wendy

2014
Arthur, Bertha, Cristobal, Dolly, Edouard, Fay, Gonzalo, Hanna, Isaias, Josephine, Kyle, Laura, Marco, Nana, Omar, Paulette, Rene, Sally, Teddy, Vicky, Wilfred

2015
Ana, Bill, Claudette, Danny, Erika, Fred, Grace, Henri, Ida, Joaquin, Kate, Larry, Mindy, Nicholas, Odette, Peter, Rose, Sam, Teresa, Victor, Wanda

2016
Alex, Bonnie, Colin, Danielle, Earl, Fiona, Gaston, Hermine, Ian, Julia, Karl, Lisa, Matthew, Nicole, Otto, Paula, Richard, Shary, Tobias, Virginie, Walter

I think this all started for me with the invention and naming of the lazy Susan. No one consulted with me about the naming of this household space saver, and I don't appreciate the lazy reference. I found this from Wikipedia:

The term "Lazy Susan" made its first written appearance in a Vanity Fair advertisement for a "Revolving Server or Lazy Susan" in 1917, although their existence dates back to the 18th century. Prior to the use of the term 'Lazy Susan', they were referred to as dumbwaiters, a term today applied to a small elevator for transporting food.

[1] There is no clear evidence as to the origin of the Susan part of Lazy Susan.

[2] The Lazy Susan can be made from a variety of materials, commonly plastic, wood, or glass.

And clearly this issue of naming hurricanes after people has got to stop, and won't you join me in my "petition" for the new ways of naming?

Leave a comment here with your favorite fish, food, animal name, or other suggestion, and I will send a link to the naming entity with our suggestions.

And if someone else is willing to take over the lazy Susan, I'd be gratefull. Bill? Nancy? Jeff? Liz? Anyone?

Your very dear, and not lazy;-) and thankfully not yet named after a hurricane,   

Susan (aka SARK)

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