Love is A Mighty Muscle

Love is A Mighty Muscle

I’ve just returned from spiritual honeymoon #2 with David, and am feeling more filled up with love than ever.

I’m also feeling more afraid of love than ever. I’m afraid of losing this incredible love, now that I’ve found it.

I’m sure this fear is to be expected, having experienced my fiancé John dying in my arms 2 1/2 years ago. How dare I return to love and loving again after THAT?

And what if THAT happens again? Which of course death WILL, one day- to both of us.

And of course this loving relationship could also end because one or both of us needs it to- for some unknowable to us now- reason or reasons.

 

It’s all SO RISKY.

Yet love moves on, like life does- growing, unfolding and calling us forward- in the midst of it all. And even when we’re afraid.

And how can I feel both of these- wanting love and fearing love- so fully?

I believe it is because we DO contain multitudes- and all of these multitudes are made up of love- in one form or another.

Love is a mighty muscle, and I’m choosing to practice strengthening it every day.

I met David’s parents and family on this trip, and it was a complete love festival- I’m honoring their privacy by not sharing photos of us- and picture this: deep resonant talks and soul sharing, mutual appreciating of David, and being welcomed heartFULLY into their family, and of course a lot of laughter born of kindred spirits.

I’m feeling so incredibly blessed by all of this new love flowing in.

While David and I were walking in the woods in Vermont, I slipped and fell down really hard on a wooden bridge that was covered in leaves after it had rained, making it extremely slippery.

I had cracked my elbow and burst into tears, and laid there trying to assess the damage. David leaned over me asking what he could do, and I replied, “Just let me lie here until I see how bad it is.”

He listened intently and then sank to the ground on the wet bridge and laid down next to me, and held my hand.
It was a complete offering of love, and exactly what I needed.

We laid there for a few moments, then rose up and thankfully I was completely fine. And after applying topical homeopathic Arnica to my elbow every 10 minutes, we were glad to discover that I experienced no bruising, swelling or pain. Arnica supports my mighty love muscles:-) in addition to David.

Experiencing this kind of soul union with David is such a beatific blessing of love.
This multiplying of love and adventurous journey is now my honor and privilege to share with you, and with the world.

Spiritual honeymoon #3 is planned for December at my home in San Francisco, and I’ll be sharing that with you too.

Let me know how love is growing and multiplying or being nurtured in your life- I’ll love to read about it.

And if you’re feeling any lack of love, please accept a lavish offering of love from me right now.

I found a powerfull journal entry from July 2016 about how mightily love goes on- I wrote it just 5 months after John left.

Here I am in November of 2018, mightily in love and loving life with David, looking back at how I allowed love IN again after such a tremendous loss. I’m so inspired by the capacity of the human heart, and of love itself, and for you, my dear loving readers, whose comments of love, appreciation, and support truly illuminate my heart.

~~~~~~~~~~~

July 2016

I’ve realized in these last 5 months that I am living a lot of people’s worst fear.

My beloved fiancé died.

I am here to say that it’s the most horrifying despair filled thing I have ever experienced, and it’s still happening as I navigate my grief journey.

Yet I want to also say that it’s not that bad. That might sound crazy based on the sentences I just wrote before this.

Let me explain.

This was one of my worst fears my whole life- what if I ever truly loved someone and then they just died? My other big fear was that they would need me to take care of them, and that I wouldn’t be able to, or want to. I was the primary caregiver for John for 9 months, and he died in my arms.

John, (and angelic others) helped me live through both of my absolute worst fears, and he loved me all the way through, as I loved him. This has changed me forever.

I also now know that his death was perfect-for him.

Not my preference at all. I would have done just about anything to save him. Until I finally learned that he didn’t need saving- his spiritual journey was about releasing his body, not keeping it.

I thought previously that if something like this illness and death ever happened to me and to someone I loved, that it would be like an unrelenting slab of endless pain crushing me constantly.

It both was and is not.

It is a giant mystery wrapped in an infinite number of enigmas.

It is a seemingly simple equation.
There were 2 and now there is 1.
Because I contain multitudes and so does John, the actual equation is much more interesting.

The nature of love multiplies beyond counting- especially when we allow it.

Who I am now, is exponentially greater and more love filled since the physical loss of John.
This loss is not diminishing my light, it is refilling it beyond anything I ever imagined.

I’m communicating with John daily in the spiritual realms, and I’m learning his vibrational language more and more.
What I thought was the “unrelenting slab of endless pain crushing me constantly” is much more varied and full of life than I previously knew.

There are feelings of relief, great humor, indelible kindness, exquisite tenderness, mixed in with despair, self torturing thoughts, pure physical missing, wailing in the bathtub, falling to the ground in agony and living with the physical absence of him in every instant.

And still, it’s not that bad.
There’s so much love and life beyond the loss.
Because of the expanded love I feel, I’m grieving deeply and living wildly both- like bird wings. This has filled me up with pure love beyond understanding.

I really thought that I might just die when John died, and in some ways I did.
I died to the majority of the unhealthy ways I’d previously been working, in addition to avoiding conflict and eating too much sugar to try to sedate my feelings. I died to sacrificing and compromising in ways that I hadn’t even recognized before John got sick.

I lived to “get happier than I’ve ever been” which John directed me to do when I asked him how I could possibly go on without him.

I lived to allow the possibility of love to bloom again in my life, which John also radiantly urged me to do.
I lived for a new way of working which feels so incredibly nourishing. I lived to be even more of myself than I ever was, and to be even more life loving than EVER.

I lived to experience love way way beyond the physical realm and communicate about it to others.
I’ve always been someone who “saw” what others didn’t, and John is further changing all my paradigms. I’m called to share with other kindred spirits who might resonate. It’s okay with me if you don’t. I’m used to being thought of as unusual;-)

I do feel immeasurably sad that John died. I also feel certain that it’s not a sad ending to a happy love story- it’s a living love story still being written and lived full out, as John did and does- now from his interdimensional playground.

I’m living and loving life more fully and deeply because of this loss, instead of despite it.

I’ve had so many experiences of John’s beyond the physical communications to me- here’s a recent one:
He asked me if I’d like to know what he looks like now, and I replied that I would. He told me to go to my weather app on my phone and there would be an image there. When I opened the app, the weather information had been erased, and the image with this post is what remained- John in his new “look.”

I’m smitten.

Here’s to all of us living and loving in the midst of destruction and fears, moving forward in faith- which is the willingness to move without proof- and find ourselves faithfully loving all-ways.

Love,

SARK

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Very Open To Energetic Shifts

Very Open To Energetic Shifts

This spells VOTES.

Tue/6 November in the United States of America.

She, he and them that vote are asking for change. BE the change that you want to have. Especially if you secretly don’t “believe in voting.”

We are picking up the stick of change and carrying it.

We ask, we ask again, we ask differently.

We ask even when the evidence is grim.

 

We ask when we are tired of hearing, knowing or seeing things in desperate disarray.

We ask when we are certain.

We ask when feel hopeless.

We are asking by acting.

We are continuing.

I just heard this definition of HOPE:
Hang
On
Pain
Ends.

Or maybe
Hold
Open
Prayer
Energy

And let us take ACTION with our prayers.

“Let us fall in love again and scatter gold dust all over the world. Let us become a new spring and feel the breeze drift in heaven’s scent. Let us dress the earth in green and like the sap of a young tree let the grace from within us sustain us. Let us carve gems out of our stony hearts and let them light our path to Love. The glance of Love is crystal clear and we are blessed by its light.” ~Rumi

Love,

SARK

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Astonished

Astonished

Thank you for so joyfully witnessing and celebrating my new quantum love union with David, and sharing your love and insights.

You can read Parts 1 & 2 of Love Comes Again here if you didn’t see them.

As we complete our second in person spiritual honeymoon, I’m contemplating the nature of love and of loving.

When I met David in May, I was Dating the World. Now I feel I’m dating the world with David, and we are multiplying the vibrations of love exponentially, as we all are- in our individual and collective love realms.

I LOVE LOVE CIRCULATING FOR US ALL.

David and I drove to Vermont this week so that I could meet his parents. We spent several magical days together and experienced so much love! It was a movable festival of love, and included all of us being REAL with our love too. I even read his parents some of your responses to my last post. They were deeply moved and felt a strong connection to all of you.

Thank you for noticing and reflecting back that I share the hard and scary parts of love also- I’ve done that all-ways and will always do it!

Love isn’t concerned with being fluffy and good looking- love moves endlessly on in indelible waves of wonderment, and I am astonished by its endless surging onward.

After John physically departed, I thought that love left with him. It seemed to me that love resided where John abided, and that there must certainly be less love available for me after his departure.

Here’s something I wrote about 3 months after John left. When I reread it now, I’m reminded that we cannot know, from inside any cavern of pain or transformational cauldron, how much love is available, and that no matter what has happened, or will ever happen to us. And that yes, he left- and that Love Comes Again and Again and Again- to infinity- for us all.

Let us hold that knowledge close and intimate as we continue to lose and find love in new places and ways.

June 2016
There Must Certainly Be Less Loving

There are terrible moments and hours and parts of days

When every object has a story

Of loss.

There is a shrieking on the inside of me that no one can see

I wonder how they can leave me alone.

I am not only grieving

I am grudgingly and microscopically moving to the awareness that

He died.

He actually died and left.

I opened my heart and he walked right through it to some other place

That I can’t get to.

He exploded into countless pieces, disappearing gradually over many months of unknowing.

I am afraid of what this is doing to me, what places may be hardening or growing rigid.

I am afraid for my life.

I am afraid of the continuous nature of his death in the face of my life

I assured him that I would be alright

I take it back.

I travel through rage and immobilizing guilt and high states of relief and freedom

I worry that I won’t be able to create a new life after this.

I am afraid that all the love left with him.

Or what I will create will not be as good as what I had.

I am afraid of what I will find as I travel to the new places I am going

How can I ever feel that this was a good thing?

I’ll never be able to hear from him again in the familiar physical ways we had

This is sinking in

I am sinking.

My stamina is on crooked

I can’t find my certainty

All the tears in the world can’t put him back together again

It’s really dawning on me that he’s really really not coming back.

I invite you to share any of my words with anyone you feel might benefit. May we all share fully and deeply with each other and the world, and in this way, help love move forward endlessly.

Love,

SARK

 

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Love Comes Again: Part 1

Love Comes Again: Part 1

When my beloved fiancé John began to transition from his physical life in March of 2016, I asked him how I could possibly go on without him.

He said so radiantly to me,

“Oh Susan, you get happy- happier than you’ve ever been- and when love comes again, you go full speed ahead.”

And, as you keep reading, you’ll discover- and be inspired by- just how full speed ahead I’ve gone!

I knew it had been possible for him to experience another great love– he had met me 9 months after his beloved wife Jeanie transitioned. He said that they’d had the best marriage ever, and that in 10 years, the honeymoon had never ended.

This captured my attention, because I’d always wanted a real life unending honeymoon with a partner, and John and I definitely experienced that for the almost 4 years we were together. Then John suddenly got sick and began to die.

I felt incredulous that this could be happening, and devastated beyond imagining. It had been one of my greatest fears that if I ever truly loved someone, what would happen to me if they just died?

What actually happened, in addition to the devastation, was that I received so many gifts and so much awareness about the gifts of death (which spells GOD;-) and that I know now that love never dies. One of my greatest fears started transforming into one of my greatest gifts.

John chose to experience his illness as a profound guide and teacher, and of course, also navigated his own panoply of feelings about physically leaving. We came up with a plan that he would communicate with me after he left, so that I would really know that it was “him.”

It was an excruciating and beautifull journey we took for 9 months, and I was his primary caregiver. I learned so much about unconditionally loving during that time, and all the ways I resist loving. When John left, I didn’t see how I could ever recover.

John almost immediately began voluminously communicating with me from beyond the physical realm, and teaching me even more about love, and about life, and how there is no “death” the way we’re taught to think about it.

I’m writing all about these teachings in a new book called

Living Wonderfull: The Surprising Gifts of Terrible Things* 

*and how to alchemize it all

And of course I’ll be sharing it with you when it’s ready!

And his leaving caused me to “grieve deeply and live wildly” over these past 2 1/2 years, and see if I could allow another great love to come into my life. John assured me from the afterlife that I would.

In May, I wrote and shared a post called “I’m Dating the World,” and here are some excerpts from it, because it’s relevant to what happened next:

“I’m enjoying responding with “I’m dating the world” when people ask me if I’m dating these days… I experienced a brief period of time last year when I was dating wonderfull men, and discovered that I wasn’t ready for more.

I’m reawakening my romantic heart slowly and more deliberately now. I’m allowing it to drip like honey. I’m trusting divine timing more than ever before.

Here I am on my birthday, drenched in love and fresh strawberries & whipped cream made by dear friends.

For me, dating the world is about reading all the poetry in my house while lying down and upside down in various spots of sunshine, and it’s about lying down in bright green grass watching flowers wave to me.

Dating the world means that I see love everywhere that I can – especially when it doesn’t look so good. It means that I blend and alchemize the wonderfull and terrible into a brand new mixture I can use more easily and then offer in healing to myself and the world…

Dating the world means that I’m never without company and rarely lonely. It means being completely surrounded with everything all-ways and practicing allowing more love IN than EVER.

Sending that love to you RIGHT NOW.”

Love Comes Again

Over 25 years ago, I created my Inspiration Line- a free phone line where I record an uplifting, depthfull message that people can call and listen to 24/7. I read poetry, sing songs and share from my heart. Many thousands of people leave messages, sharing their hearts and thoughts with me, in response to reading my books, taking one of my programs, or hearing my message. I’ve had the privilege of listening to what feels like the collective consciousness for all these years.

On May 20, I received an inspiring message on my Inspiration Line from a man responding to my email and post about dating the world. His voice was filled with love and joy, and although he made me laugh, his message also deeply touched my heart.

He said:

“Oh my God, I love you so much. I just love the letter you sent out about dating the world. That’s how I live too! And- it’s just so beautiful to recognize someone on the same frequency, you know? And female- just loving the world like that, thank you.

I’ve been listening to these messages for a lot of years and just loving it. And I just wanted to tell you how much I appreciate it, and how much I love you for doing this.

(And then in one breath he exclaimed:)

I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you! I love you! I love you! I love you! I love you! I love you! I love you! I love you! I love you! I love you! I love you! I love you! I love you! I love you! I love you! I love you! I love you! I love you!

(And then he paused and asked:)

Is this too much?

(Then his message continued with the same passion)

I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you! Thank you for everything. My name is David, and I’m just sending you lots of love. If you ever want to call or text here’s my number. I just so appreciate you and I’m just loving your heart right now. Thank you, take care, bye.”

I definitely felt highly intrigued by hearing his message, and excited that he might actually be living in my kind of frequency. I intuitively sensed his passion and joy, and I heard his not wanting anything, but just wanting to give me love and appreciation- and I called him back the next day. We immediately and profoundly connected with each other.

I quickly found him to be grounded, and as creatively prolific as me(!) and extremely funny and not at all normal- which for me, is an essential quality. He also had a lot of emotional intelligence and awareness and we began sharing everything about our lives. We were excited to discover that we shared incredibly similar ways of seeing the world and shockingly similar interests.

We spoke for many hours at a time and were both continually amazed by how deeply we connected in our talks. We began exploring ways we might relate with each other in the world.

Mostly we laughed together- sometimes for many minutes without a subject. I can honestly say that in these months since May, I’ve laughed harder than I’ve laughed at any other time of my life. It became more and more clear that we wanted to be together in some form.

We’ve been experiencing a quantum love union since then, and only through hundreds of hours of talking by telephone, and using other methods like sending audio notes, texts, photos, videos, and learning about each other while having no physical contact.

We were so glad to discover that we could connect so deeply soul to soul while being on opposite coasts of the country.

We briefly saw each other twice by video after months of talking, and it was immediately obvious to me that everything I wanted was there. Then we went right back to the particular intimacy of our phone calls.

I’ve always loved communicating on the phone, and so has David, and our love grew exponentially as we talked.

And we didn’t just talk…

We prayed, meditated, shared “micro truths” and explored our shadows and vulnerabilities together. We learned about and celebrated our uncanny commonalities and- uncommon differences. We started supporting each other in all areas of our lives and with our creative projects.

We created a foundational basis of trust and then became lovers too. Some would describe it as phone sex, which it certainly was, but it was much more. It was also soul level love making, and it allowed me to access profound orgasmic experiences that reached parts of my being that hadn’t been reached before.

My dear friend Amy pointed out to me that I fell in love with John on the physical level, and then he taught me about loving in the non physical realms. And that with David it was the opposite: I began loving him from the non-physical realms and then moved to the physical.

It’s all been PHENOMENALLY fantastic and also unusual for me to not share publicly. All of my books contain my personal life stories that are also universal. As you may know, I haven’t ever held back from sharing intimately, and this new love was bringing out new vulnerabilities, so I decided to go slowly with sharing.

David had also assessed that I had guards protecting my heart from previous traumas, and said; “I’m committed to your taking the time to feel as safe as you’ve ever felt with another person before you share your experiences publicly.”

He said he would help me to love and soothe those guards, and to love my shy self as much as my other aspects, and this touched me deeply, as I’d not had someone attend to my shy self like this before.

I decided to see what it felt like to really live in the experience before I started sharing it publicly, and it has felt immersive, tender and intimate.

David studied me, so he could love me better and help me feel safer and happier. He discovered what specific words encouraged and inspired me, and he learned who all my close friends are (and I have many!) and what I loved specifically about each one of them.

I loved being “studied” like this– because this is what I do with people I’m close to- I’ve just never had it applied so lovingly and thoroughly to me before.

He told me one day, “I’m majoring in Susan Kennedy, and minoring in SARK.”

Even though he had called the Inspiration Line, he had never read a SARK book, so he didn’t know me in that way. I appreciated that there weren’t projections about me as “SARK” and that he took the time to really experience who I am in my private life.

I’m sharing this now because I feel safe and ready, and so that others can feel inspired by my real life love story! I’m so glad to share about alternative forms of relating and being in love relationships- whatever form they take.

Right after I began connecting with David, my beyond the physical fiancé John exclaimed immediately in my ear,

“I LOVE David!!!” And keeps exclaiming.

After my full summer of mentoring and leading retreats, David and I decided to physically meet for the first time at his lake home in Massachusetts on Sep 2.

We decided to give ourselves time alone, in a setting that supported our health and well being as well as our creativity. We wanted to give ourselves the best opportunity to thrive as lovers, artists, creators, healers, and friends.

We also decided that this first date would be like a spiritual honeymoon, and to just skip the wedding and go straight to the honeymoon. We’ve also decided as much as possible, to have an “all honeymoon” relationship. What this means to us, is that we are committed to loving as much as possible, no matter what form that love takes. We did decide to begin as monogamously romantic love partners. And so, I arranged a 2 week vacation from all of my work and flew to Boston to meet David in person for the first time on Sun/2 of September.

Stay tuned for part 2 of my real life love story and what actually happened when we met for our spiritual honeymoon- I’ll share soon;-)

Here’s an excerpt of what I initially posted about inviting you to vicariously travel along:

Here I am in one of my favorite spots in San Francisco, popping in with a happy halo + goodbye to you.

I’m about to be away for several weeks on an adventurous vacation and I’m inviting you to vicariously travel along, if you’re willing to not know where you’re going;-)

I’ll be sharing later about my adventures, and let you know where we went!

So, for everyone who read that post and responded so enthusiastically, thank you for all your love – and now you know how adventurous this trip really was!

And for each person reading this now, I invite you to consider dating the world and opening your life more and more to the magic of love.

Because loving is the whole point.

Love,

SARK

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Love Comes Again: Part 2

Love Comes Again: Part 2

I traveled from my home in San Francisco to Boston to meet my new lover and soulmate David for the first time on Sep 2. He had called my Inspiration phone Line on May 20, and we began our love relationship for many months- only by telephone.

We had decided that our first “date” would be a 2 week spiritual honeymoon- that we would skip the wedding and go straight to the honeymoon and have an all honeymoon” relationship as much as possible- which includes ALL of our feelings, in this marvelous messy middle place called life.

I believe that there are always angels all around, and I met two of them the moment I sat down in my seat on the plane. Sandy & Bob have been married 56 years, and were seated right next to me.

I shared everything with Sandy about how David and I met, and my nervousness and excitement about meeting him in person for the first time, and about how it was newly dawning on me that our first date would also be two weeks of living together! Then her husband Bob joined in to our wildly intimate conversation.

Sandy and I spontaneously hugged many times and cried together too. The three of us bonded on all sorts of subjects, and I felt that they were helping to deliver me to my new life experience-on the first leg of their trip to Ireland.

After I got off the plane I called David, and he was in baggage claim waiting for me. A few moments later, I descended on the escalator and saw him right away.

It felt like my heart actually leapt toward him. We swooned into each other’s arms and embraced while we laughed and said I love you and just stayed that way as a mob of people seeking their luggage kept squeezing past us- and we couldn’t stop swooning.

Here we are together for the first time, about 5 minutes after we met.

We both felt like we were intoxicated- and I’m sure we were- but we somehow got the luggage and made it to the car for the drive to his home.

David had prepared his lake home as our honeymoon suite, by asking me in advance for a specific list of all of my favorite foods, favorite sheets, towels, scents and everything he could think of so I would feel exquisitely at home. He’d even stocked the refrigerator with all my favorite organic fruits and vegetables.

We’d planned that I’d have my own bedroom. He also offered to rent me a car and let me know about hiking trails nearby. We had discussed having together time and separate time, as we’re both writers and creators who appreciate that, and wanted to create our honeymoon to also be a creative retreat.

He’d replaced the chlorinated water in his hot tub with Bromine, and ordered my favorite enlightened board game- the Transformation Game- so we could play together. The stage was set for 2 weeks together without work, for 2 souls to truly commune.

And he hadn’t only readied his home for me, he’d readied his soul. We’d both been getting ourselves ready to meet, by practicing being and living the kind of love we’d always wanted.

He had written love letters in his journal to his soulmate several years before, as if they were already together. He also wrote beautiful love letters from his soulmate to him. Those letters sounded as if I had actually written them- the letters to him, were my letters- same spellings, and intonations. It is truly uncanny.

He made a series of audios to give to his soulmate when she arrived, and I’ve received the first one- which is remarkable- it’s him, talking intimately and deeply to me- years before meeting me.

All of these experiences showed me his commitment to experience and express love, and inspired me deeply to do the same. After John left, I wasn’t sure that I could open my heart so intimately again, and his willingness to do so, caused me and my heart to bloom forward hugely.

I’d brought him gifts of bright markers- he’s a writer and artist of life who creates and puts up colorfull signs of affirmation in his home, and writes them in neon markers on his windows and mirrors to help him embody positive uplifting messages.

He even put signs on each stair leading up to the second floor, which he calls the “stairway to heaven.” As he ascends the stairway he takes in each truth one stair at a time- and also has signs facing the other way, so he can read those going down!

I’d also brought one of my favorite children’s books to read together and one of my divination card decks to play with.

As marvelous as all of our time on the phone had been, the physical was- after some adjustment to actually being physical- even better.

And yes to the holy in person orgasms! And breakfast in bed, canoeing, hiking, hot tubbing on the deck, long talking and SO MUCH LAUGHING and creating.


We floated around together in a kind of earthly honeymoon heaven for a day or two, and then descended right into what I describe as a transformational cauldron-
 in the form of his being triggered by some business things, and withdrawing and becoming distant.

We didn’t seem able to talk about things in a way that we always had before. I felt uncomfortable and like he needed space. I also felt alone in a way that caused me to begin thinking of leaving. That then triggered all sorts of other things for us both, and we found ourselves floundering.

Thankfully our foundational basis of trust had been established over the phone for the past few months. So we shared “microtruthfully” about our experiences and feelings- first on the phone, from separate bedrooms – and then on a long hike through the woods- as we navigated the form and ways of communicating we wanted our relationship to take.

Of course this is the highly abbreviated version here- it felt at the time challenging, scary and not at all easy.

We agreed that I would stay, and that we would continue on our spiritual honeymoon, and that of course “transformational cauldrons” are part of that.

We settled into an easy new rhythm of writing in the mornings- and not seeing each other until lunch- which gave us both nourishing time for ourselves.

We then took a hike in nature together, and had plenty of time for lovemaking, cooking, playing, laughing, being- with plenty of both solitude and togetherness- my favorite combination, and David’s favorite too.

We continued sharing vulnerabilities and microtruths, and established even deeper intimacies.

My last love relationship with John had been like the best of being soulfully single- only better- and I knew I wanted that, or better with David. We created our version of that in this beginning of our time together, and recommitted to bringing ALL of ourselves to the relationship, and working through whatever comes up together- this is the “real life love story” part.

It’s also a commitment to use all of our feelings to create even more intimacy, which John & I wrote about in our amazing book, Succulent Wild Love.

I very reluctantly went home after 2 weeks as planned. During our month apart, we felt closer than ever, and I’ve now returned to his lake house for another 2 week visit (our second honeymoon!).

I’m also going to meet his parents and more of his family, while we continue our creative retreat- writing together and separately.

He’d like to move back to California soon, and the San Francisco Bay Area is looking really good to him- and to me. Amazingly, he had thought about moving back before he met me, and he also has family and friends in the area.

Who knows what forms and shapes love will take?

I’ve wondered about writing and sharing all of this publicly, just in case we don’t stay together in the same form we started with- as if that’s some kind of measure of “success.” I then reminded myself that the true success for us all is that love comes again, no matter what the form or length of time.

I also want to inspire those who wish to explore romantic- or other kinds- of love with another soul, to consider going inward, outward, forward in new ways, and take risks for, and with love.

David and I are committed to living the all honeymoon life together as much as possible, and that includes ALL of it- the marvelous, and not so marvelous, messy middle- and alchemizing the terrible and wonderfull things into a brand new healing mixture for ourselves and for the world.

I’m so glad and gratefull for every moment of love coming again, and plan to be as present as I can for all of its messy magnificence.

And of course I’m writing all about it, and will share my new book when it’s ready. It’s called:

Living Wonderfull: The Surprising Gifts of Terrible Things*

*and how to alchemize it all

Thank you all for traveling along and compassionately witnessing and celebrating my experience and being in my life!

I’ll be writing and sharing more of my love adventures too– let me know if you’d like to read them, and what parts have inspired you the most.

Here is my Inspiration Line number, which is free to call 24 hours a day, for the last 25 + years, at 415 546 3742.

I invite you to share this number with anyone who you feel would benefit from hearing it.

Love,

SARK

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Stay Calm and….

Stay Calm and….

Baby SARKDear Luxurious Soul,

April is my birth~day month. And here I am starting out at 1.
And here’s a birthday candle that my goddaughter Vanessa gave me, to delight me, and it does.

Birthday Candle

I started celebrating for the whole month a number of years ago.
I did it at first to have more opportunities to celebrate, AND also now to allow for all of the marvelous messy middleness of life. (The auto correct just changed that word to middlemess:-) which is also accurate.)

It is so very MESSY being a human bean.
There are so many moods and feelings, and that’s just inside ourselves!
Not to mention the other people…..

John and I are deep into the final edits and art creation for our new book, Succulent Wild Love, which you’ll be hearing all about later.

Meanwhile, we’re in our “Creative Cove,” which sometimes has choppy waters!
I have also had wonderfull experiences and birthday celebrations all month and intend to continue.

During this time, (and every time) I am reminded of that poster that says Stay Calm and Carry On- it always calms me, and I love all the iterations of it that are out there.

One of my favorites is;
Stay Calm and Carry On Writing.

And so, I shall.

What soothes you and reminds you to keep going? Let me know in the comments and we’ll celebrate together. Or, if you have birthday wishes for me, feel free to let me know! I created a new Inspiration Line message too, and you can call me at 415 546 3742.

Your very own SARK bean,
Susan

p.s. for those of you who might have planned to see John & me in June in Chicago, our plans have changed. Stay tuned in for other opportunities to see us in person- we’ll be letting you know what those will be!

Unexpected Sweetnesses

Unexpected Sweetnesses

As I move around the world in my life, I’m always being reminded that there are unexpected sweetnesses to be seen and appreciated.

While on a beach walk with my partner John the other day, I was feeling rather crabby and out of sorts, while discussing a business topic.

At the height of my frustration, I looked down to see that someone had built a little “sandman,” and his existence cheered me enormously and shifted my frustration instantly.

Sandman

Sometimes I get stuck in repetitive negative stories and forget that the world can help me to see the sweet, unexpected things, and to remind me of them.

Here’s what someone wrote on the sidewalk near my house:

 Walls

It reminded me to bring our insides outside, wherever we go- that we are sheltered in our explorations.

I am sending you unexpected sweetnesses in your life in this moment, and in every moment.

May we open our hearts and eyes to receive them. Let’s notice and celebrate as much and as often as we possibly can.

We can create our worlds NEW along the way, and I’m reminding us all to do it. And to transform ourselves along the way.

Bursting with joy at unexpected sweetnesses,

SARK (aka Susan Ariel Rainbow Kennedy)

 

For You: Love As Big As The Whole Sky

For You: Love As Big As The Whole Sky

Sky

To my dearest Love’s Blossom,

I am envisioning a spectacular New Year ahead for you.

It is moonlit and filled with fresh wonders.

New brave parts of you are emerging.

Wily old patterns are untangling.

Ways that you thought you needed to be don’t apply anymore.

You are drenched in self love and love from unexpected sources.

You are the source.

You see yourself smiling on the inside.

You walk forward with the posture you just always knew you didn’t need to “work at.”

All your dreams start manifesting in ways you always thought they would.

Dreams that aren’t happening, are not the ones that would nourish you most.

Trust renews itself.

Miracles roll in.

People come towards you in new wonderfull ways.

You are not a quitter- you are a chooser.

Your vision improves and you see love everywhere.

Everywhere.

I love you.
SARK (aka Susan)

 

Write to Love

Write to Love

After I married myself in 1997, I wondered how, when or if – I would ever integrate another loving person into my life again.

Almost immediately, I met a great person and enjoyed a loving relationship for 5 years until it ended. I had another wonderfull relationship in 2008 for awhile, and when that one ended, I wrote a long letter to the universe about the qualities of relating that I wished to experience.

I also began exploring being “consciously single” and the nature of soul mates and whether I even wanted to have another partner- in addition to myself.

I ranted about what I call the “cult of couples” and started writing about being a “family of one” who was happily single by choice.

I keep a joy box in my bedroom, and write notes to put into it – about things I’d like to experience.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A few months ago, as a part of a game in my WINS writing program, I shared a note I’d written and put into my joy box, that said:

“Someone to love and adore,

who also loves and adores me.”

I know that everything I’ve ever wanted, I’ve written about first. This “write to love” brought about a particularly great result.

In August, I met a person to adore and be adored by. We are now living together in San Francisco.

This is big news, because I have never lived full time with a lover. I’ve always kept them at some distance 🙂

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Of course, time will reveal what he and I are meant to do, and be together. And you can be sure I’ll be writing about it and sharing with you!

I created my WINS program to provide my mentoring and writing support for you. My WINS program is available now for the fall session, and I’ll be there, filling souls to overflowing.

Joy*fully,

Susan (aka SARK)

PS – In WINS+, I read your writing every month and respond in my own voice to you. There are only a limited number of spots available. Go here to find out more.

Inspiration

Who “lights up” when they see you?

Who inspires you GREATLY?

Inspiration is a pure creative dream source energy that you can manufacture and distribute yourself. Inspiration is an “inside job” that holds tremendous benefits. When we are inspired, we literally “move from spirit.”

Who and what move you and your spirit? Apply liberally, and tell me what you discovered.